For decades, the model of a major philanthropist has remained largely unchanged: a man with wealth, standing in front of a building bearing his name. But the reality has always been more complex, and perhaps no one understands this better than Theresa Butler-Porter.
“People still aren’t seeing women as philanthropists,” she says. “They’re not paying attention to them, they’re not listening, they’re slow to engage them the way they need to be engaged to become committed or interested in organizations and causes.”
Theresa transitioned to the philanthropic sector nearly twenty-five years ago after a long career in retail. She now guides donors through decisions that will shape institutions and communities long after they’re gone. In her time stewarding donors, Theresa has witnessed firsthand how the landscape of giving is shifting: not in sudden upheavals, but in a steady, determined movement led by women who, for the most part, do not seek recognition.
The Overlooked Philanthropists
“Women don’t care as much about their names on buildings,” Theresa explains. “If you go to any big university or hospital, it’s very rare to see a woman’s name on a building because that’s not what she cares about. She cares about the people and the programs, that’s what matters to her.”
Women give differently. They don’t simply write cheques; they invest time, they build relationships, and they want to see tangible impacts. The very structure of charitable giving has long catered to a more transactional style of philanthropy, one that assumes a donor’s primary motivation is tax relief or legacy in the form of a plaque or an honorary title. But women, Theresa argues, want something else entirely. They want engagement.
“Women really need to be involved in an organization before they make any kind of commitment. If an organization isn’t prepared to engage them either as a volunteer or to let them dip their toe in to fully understand the challenges and vision, they’re probably not going to make a significant gift.”
This need for engagement has, in some cases, upended traditional fundraising models. Organizations that fail to understand it risk missing out on a growing and deeply committed base of donors. “It’s short-sighted of any organization to not pay attention to their legacy giving or their planned giving, and not to pay attention to women,” she says. “Because both of those things can turn your organization around and make sure that you’re sustainable into the future.”
The Long-Term View
Women typically live longer than men. They are more financially independent than ever before. Many inherit significant wealth from their parents and their husbands/partners yet they too often remain invisible or underestimated in the world of philanthropy.
“We always used to try and meet with the male partner in a couple,” Theresa recalls of her early days in fundraising. “We’d go to his office, do our pitch. But the bottom line is, ninety percent of the philanthropic decisions in a household are made by the woman. And yet, we still default to the man.”
This unspoken bias has consequences, not just for fundraisers, but for the future of philanthropy itself. Women, Theresa notes, don’t just give, they advocate. They create networks of giving, leveraging their communities to amplify impact.
“If they believe in an organization, they will support it. But don’t disappoint them,” she advises. “Don’t let them down. Because if you do, they’ll walk away.”
The Power of Collective Giving
One of the most telling indicators of how women approach philanthropy differently is the rise of giving circles, which are groups of individuals pooling their resources to fund projects collectively. “Women love to do things as a group,” Theresa says. “I don’t want to give you a million dollars on my own. I want to be with nine other people and each of us will give you a million. We’re going to do it together.”
The communal aspect of women’s philanthropy is more than just a preference; it’s a reflection of a deeply ingrained approach to leadership and impact. “Seasoned female philanthropists appreciate respect, meaningful connections, and the opportunity to share their wisdom,” she adds. “They like to witness the next generation continuing what they started. Because nobody wants their accomplishments to be forgotten.”
Legacy Beyond the Plaque
The idea that philanthropy is about more than recognition is neatly illustrated by the Almira Grover Foley Fund. Almira and her husband ran the first general store and post office in Norwood. She left most of her estate “to [the] poor, the widows & orphans not otherwise provided for & other virtuous but helpless people of the county of Peterboro.” Her quiet legacy, now stewarded by the Community Foundation, has supported women and children in the region ever since.
Philanthropy is not reserved for the wealthy or those at the end of their lives. Theresa is herself a monthly donor to the Community Foundation, a commitment that allows her to support an organization she cares about consistently and meaningfully. “My planned gift was initially given to fund professional development for staff,” she says. “Because I believe in investing in the people who make organizations stronger.”
For those inspired by the stories of women shaping philanthropy, becoming a monthly donor is a simple but powerful way to contribute. If you want to explore the possibility of establishing your own fund at the Foundation, or starting a giving circle, please get in touch.